(Editor’s note: Here’s a junk e-mail we received recently and almost deleted without reading it.)
CONFIDENTIAL
FROM: Mr. George W. Bush
E-MAIL: president@whitehouse.gov
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
URGENT BUSINESS PROPOSAL
Dear Sir/Madam,
My name is MR. GEORGE W. BUSH, the son of the former President George H.W. Bush of Texas. I got your information through a discreet inquiry from Republican pollster here in Washington. Be informed that my informant is aware of the nature of business I am asking for your assistance.
I have an urgent business, which I want to disclose to you. I believe it will be beneficial to both of us. After the defeat of my father, and the taking over of power by Bill Clinton and his wife, we discover that Iraq has the world’s second largest oil reserves, and that my father made a big mistake when he didn’t take them. We also learned that promising a tiny tax cut to middle class people, we could pass a one trillion, 350 billion United States Dollars tax cut (US$1,350,000,000,000) over 10 years that gives 38 percent of benefit to people who make more than 1 million U.S. dollars (US$1,000,000) a year.
We discovered that if we convince American people that terrorism is important reason to invade Iraq, we can take control of oil fields. We found also that if we increase spending and create 157 billion U.S. dollar deficit this year (US$157,000,000,000), peoples won’t worry about how much that will cost them in years to come and forget there was a 127 billion U.S. dollar surplus (US$127,000,000,000) a year ago.
I have the previlage in contacting you for an urgent assistance. If you vote for candidates who support this plan, we propose to continue tax cut that spreads less than 15% of the benefit amongst the bottom 60% of taxpayers. We will be also making war to get oil, whether country allows weapons inspections or has nucular weapons or not. We will not stop limiting civil liberties. We will cut workplace safety like when we removed ergonomic standards. We will start new fight to drill for oil in Arctic preserve. We will push fast-track trade to help multinational companies. We will minimize corporation reforms and limits of pay for big execs. We will keep push to privatize Social Security. We will be for only limited prescription drug help for citizen seniors.
We have arranged also to give you more than 50% of justices on U.S. Supreme Court who oppose abortion.
I will like all our communication to be through my Email address for security reasons.
I stand by to read from you soonest.
Sincerely,
G. Bush
Richard Hart