To be sure, you’re not going to leave Raleigh after days of conversations about cattle herding or rhinoplasties without something for the kids and the friends. We ain’t got much in Raleighno Kansas steaks or “Keep Austin Weird” coffee mugsbut we do think these trinkets would make the kids (confused) (disappointed) smile.

  • N.C. State Athletics keychain: No. 1 in rifling, but not much else.
    Sports? Ha! Not in this town. On opening weekend, UNC wins, ECU wins and Duke wins, but N.C. State drops one 34-0 in South Carolina. Will things be much better if you’re into Men’s Basketball? Eh.
  • Grainy cell phone photo from Glenwood South … nudity implied.
    Because your bros in the office won’t believe she exists unless you have evidence.
  • Raleigh>Charlotte T-shirt
    “How badass is Raleigh?” one wonders. Raleigh is so badass that the sale of innocent (if somewhat misguided) T-shirts exercising trichotomy are contraband this weekend! Dangerous. (P.S., this is a true story..)
  • RBC Baseball Cap: Canada 2 CarolinaBridge that gap.
    You, young tourist, may be wondering how the Royal Bank of Canada came to get its name on Raleigh’s biggest buildings. Hell, so are we.
  • Jesse Helms’ Big Ol’ Bag of Grass
    Get caught picking the grass from Jesse Helms’ gravesite, and you may go to jail. But get away and smoke that spliff, you’ll be at the right hand of that ol’ codger in Heaven.