Old-fashioned, good-time loud rock music tends to be about women, partying, women, smoking in the boys’ room, school being out forever and women. And old-fashioned, good-time loud rock dudes tend not to be overly deep thinkers when it comes to women, leading to four basic categorizations: unattainable, teasing, willing, disinterested. When the dude psyche, a notoriously delicate and fragile instrument (think Stradivarius violin … or Flying V guitar), confronts that last category, there’s just got to be an explanation.

Here, on the debut 7″ from Raleigh quartet The Static Minds, there are two. A-side reasoning: She’s too busy being rich and, memorably put, “dying in her own bad taste.” B-side reasoning: She’s too busy being a bore. And there also seems to be some kind of inner thigh issue.

Old-fashioned, good-time loud rock also tends to be about crunchy guitars, sleazy bass, wiry guitars, snappy drums, persuasive vocals and runaway guitars. Six checks here, plus a big one for shout-along refrains: “She’s like a diamond ring you’d never buy/ She’s got it all but never has a good time,” explains “Rich Girl Blues,” while “She’s a Bore” accuses, “I could give you everything, but you always needed more/ Honey, it’s a crying shame, you turned out to be a bore.” The four Static Mindersvets of the Cherry Valence, the Dragstrip Syndicate, the T’s and the Royal Nitesknow how that rock is done, and here, they do it well. Good times, good times.

The Static Minds’ 7-inch release party is Saturday, March 6, at the Berkeley Cafe, with The Dynamite Brothers and The Magic Babies also on the bill. $5 gets you in (or $8 if you want a copy of the record), and the good timing starts at 9 p.m.