Heading west on Interstate 40, where Durham County yields to Orange, there’s a road sign that says, “Welcome to Orange County: You’ll Be a Fan for Life.” The sign’s beat up and damaged, and Orange County is in the process of replacing it. The county also figured this might be a good time to update the slogan, so in December it solicited ideas from the general public.

Last week, after reviewing over eight hundred submissions, the possibilities were narrowed to eleven. These finalists are, to be honest, a tad boring, as these things tend to be (“Where education meets opportunity”; “Visit today. Stay for life”; etc.). But not all the proposals had that market-research ring to them; in fact, many offered pointed commentaries on everything from taxation to atheism to breastfeeding to Duke sucking.

The INDY requested the entirety of citizen suggestions from the Chapel Hill and Orange County Visitors Bureau. We’ve picked out twenty-five of our favoritesnone of which we made up, honestand reproduced them below exactly as they were submitted, spelling, grammar, and capitalization errors included. Enjoy!

  • Were too backwoods
  • NCAA history
  • Godless Heathens Ahead
  • A Step Above Hillsboro!
  • People’s Republic
  • Boogie Shoes
  • Editor’s Note: LOL WTF?
  • The FIRST Breastfeeding Family Friendly Community!
  • We Bad!
  • Jesse Helm’s Zoo
  • Future Home of NC’s Beaches
  • The Orange County Board of Commissioners is expected to announce the new slogan by early March.
  • triangulator@indyweek.com